Disciplining Ford

ADULTS ONLY: Disciplining Ford describes my experiences in submitting to a lifestyle of Domestic Discipline from DW, my wonderful (and now disciplinary) wife of nearly 15 years. About 7 years ago we formalised a Disciplinary Agreement to deal with certain of my behaviours that justify DW in applying a range of penalties - that include severe spankings... amongst others.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

... in with the new.

After the completion of my second spanking instalment on Saturday (and a not unexpected tenderly butt-stinging time in the shower), DW determined that I was to remain in panties until Tuesday morning, when I was due to return to work after the Easter holiday break - assuming that my behaviour remained of an acceptable standard meanwhile.

Sunday morning saw me repairing to the hardware shop in search of some raw material from which to fashion a suitable replacement for the faithful Spencer Paddle that DW had succeeded in splitting across my backside. This I found in the form of some 12mm thick sections of oak in widths of approximately 70 and 90mm, the latter being closest in width to the old paddle. On (I suspect a rather bad) impulse, I also purchased a short length of 180mm wide good quality pine, about 12 mm thick.

The reason behind the last purchase has some history that dates back my meanderings through the F/m world and when I was subscribed to a website that specialises in photos and videos of men being spanked by women. One video set in particular that I shared relatively recently with DW shows a male spankee secured over the back of a rather large arm chair receiving multiple sets of six from an attractive disciplinarian in a rather short skirt. On the whole he is coping reasonably well with the strokes from a variety of implements, with his counting becoming just a fraction agitated by the sixth, and occasionally the fifth stroke - that is until his disciplinarian produces a majorly serious paddle which coincidentally, looks about 180mm wide and about 12mm thick.

The volume and tone of his responses to each stroke is radically different right from the very first. Only with what seems like a monumental effort of will after the fifth stroke does he manage to get his call of the count back from a rather high-pitched almost squeal, to a more male-sounding register. "How efficient!" remarks DW, "being able to get such a good reaction from so few strokes". Mind you, if I produced the profanities that he did during this set of six strokes, I would be in panties and unable to sit comfortably for an indefinite period!

So while that particular piece of timber remains parked in the shed at the moment, I have had the time and opportunity to produce an oak replacement for our broken paddle that is virtually identical in size and shape. However, my first heft of the completed article revealed its decidedly increased weight in comparison to its pine counterpart...

Incidentally, I've also found the work of manufacturing the implements for use during my punishments to be a very strongly affecting aspect of my submission to DW's discipline - and can recommend it to those so inclined.
Right now I am back in male underwear, but the manner in which DW has eyed off the new paddle gives some cause to believe that its maiden application to my backside may not be far away.

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Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Over Again

The rest of the spanking that DW had so generously promised at the completion of Thursday's exertions had to wait a few days, again because of unscheduled arrivals by various family members. Even on Thursday, we hadn't realised just how tight the window of opportunity would be and exchanged some rather knowing looks as we emerged from the bedroom and heard the sound of the front door opening not long afterwards. But come Saturday, DW managed to catch me unaware with a well-improvised ambush.

I'd been out playing sport (thankfully whilst temporarily exempted from panty-wearing) and rather than diving straight for the shower on arriving home, had sat down for about 10 minutes to catch up on some email. Once done, and finding that DW was no longer at her desk, I wandered toward the bedroom with the vague intention of heading for the shower - where I found DW standing at the door - "Coming to have your shower are you?" Thinking that this was a not so subtle hint that I should really get serious about doing so, I entered the bedroom. It only took a few seconds for me to conclude that certain 'preliminaries' were to be conducted first however.

Four pillows were back in the position that had become familiar from Thursday, only this time accompanied by the hairbrush, Spencer Paddle and one of our two canes - the straight one with the leather grip. Up until that moment, the serious spanking that all this portended was possibly about the last thing I was expecting but nevertheless, my submission to it was absolutely what DW was requiring. I left my top on, but pulled off my shoes, socks, shorts and underpants before once again assuming my position over the pile of pillows and taking firm grip on the end of the bed.

The hairbrush was to be first and DW set to work, alternating from one side of my butt to the other with real enthusiasm. Meanwhile, I struggled to maintain an accurate count of the strokes and by fifty, the brush had done its usual job of turning my knuckles white as I reflexively gripped the end of the bed and was breathing quite hard. DW then paused, and reached for the cane. This is a fairly new addition to our relatively small collection of implements, and its full ability to inflict pain and create longer-lasting marks is still largely an unknown quantity to both of us. It's approximately 8mm in diameter, just over 900mm in length and reputedly of rattan - a combination that seems to put it at the "sting" end of the sensation scale. I've also read of the alleged potential for such a cane to cut flesh and wrap around. Although this has not been our experience to date, it also leads me to suspect that we have yet to realise its complete potential as a quiet achiever (certainly quieter than the hairbrush and paddle).

After 20 quite rapidly applied strokes, DW had turned the stinging in my backside to a feeling that it was radiating heat like a fire.

DW then reached for our homemade Spencer Paddle. Fashioned out of knot-free pine about 10mm thick with three rows of holes to ensure that no cushion of air spares the recipient, I am well and truly familiar with its potential for pain and lingering after effects. DW has made a specialty of applying it either across both butt cheeks, or much worse, to one cheek at a time. After about 15 absolutely ringing strokes, DW decided that she might even up the effect a little by trying her hand at some backhand strokes from the other side of the bed. I slid across a little grudgingly to facilitate this and away she went. After about 5 strokes, it happened - our old, tried and true Spencer Paddle, veteran of many a punishment campaign had had enough, and split into two pieces! We were both more than a little stunned.

DW chose to make up the rest of the 100 she had mentally allocated with the hairbrush and left me to recover some composure.

"I think you were about to go and have a shower?", DW mused. That had certainly been the plan before I was waylaid - but with the thought of how the hot water would amplify the stinging pain in my freshly tanned butt, the urgency for it somehow seemed to have subsided.


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Sunday, April 16, 2006

Measures of Effectiveness

As near as I can tell, DW has three primary ways of determining whether a remedial spanking has adequately achieved its purpose:

1. It must be sufficiently painful during the course of its delivery.
Based on a combination of the sound of its delivery and my reaction, with practice, DW has learnt to judge whether each stroke has proven effective for the particular instrument in use. For the hairbrush and Spencer paddle, DW knows that a well-delivered stroke makes a resounding report that echoes loudly throughout the room and beyond - whereas a stroke that produces only a dull thud has added little of value to the punishment.

In my experience, certain assumed positions and locations seem more conducive to the delivery of effective punishment strokes. Perhaps all too obviously, the most painful lessons have occurred when I am bent over the farthest, and when DW has had confident "swinging room" to deliver more fulsome strokes. In terms of sheer pain 'value', I'd have to rate being straddled over the side of the spa as perhaps the most memorable - something about that particular arrangement seems to put DW into stride and my memory of the last 100 rapid, perfectly delivered strokes from the hairbrush that I received in that position is still very fresh. A closely ranked second would be over the back of a captain's chair at a hired cottage that provided just the right combination of height and reach - yeeouch!!

DW is also not in the custom of nominating beforehand the number of strokes that I am to receive - preferring, I believe, to rely on the progression of my responses and the visible state of my backside to deem what is sufficient, and quite often, that a punishment should be paused or even split over multiple days in order to maintain the effectiveness of each stroke. After all, there is not much point in continuing on immediately if it has become obvious that a spanking has reached a point of 'diminished return'. An hour's break usually seems sufficient to ensure a renewed effectiveness - and when they occasionally occur, on-the-hour repeat spankings over the course of a day are something to be reckoned with!

For more rapidly delivered strokes, the interval between them is kept pretty constant, allowing just sufficient time for any involuntary exclamatory response on my part, and to announce the count. Nevertheless, I feel sure there are times when DW is deliberately raising the rate to test the limits of my endurance, and so that my response and counting become intermingled.

I expect that as our inventory of spanking implements progressively grows, the role will become clear for a more leisurely rate of delivery from items such as a severe cane or large paddle - where I suspect that the progression of pain sensations from each individual stroke is an event in itself. That red ball gag in the drawer may then find a use in keeping my noise level below that of the spanking strokes themselves.

2. Its effects must be visibly apparent for several days after the event - as a minimum.
When DW has decreed a punishment spanking, I can be sure that it will continue either continuously or in stages, until she is convinced that I will carry the visible signs of it for an appropriate period of time. As this is often difficult to judge on the same day that a spanking has occurred, DW has made a frequent practice of inspecting my backside over the days following a punishment spanking to ensure that she has 'left her mark' on me. As the general redness of a spanking fades, DW is content only if she finds more lasting signs such as tell-tale dark red lines and/or more generalised bruises. We've also been somewhat surprised by the ability of a hot shower to restore that healthy glow to my butt for a week or more after the event.

If, contrary to expectations, the markings are not sufficiently persistent, repeat performances can be expected until such time as they are.

After one particularly punishing weekend, the blisters on my butt cheeks took a full 3 weeks to resolve themselves. This in itself gave rise to the codeword between us of 'weekend' - which when used by DW, can be translated as an extremely severe warning to cease any particularly bad behaviour on my part.

3. The pain should also persist for some days as an ongoing reminder .
As this can also be difficult to judge at the time of the spanking, DW has adopted more of a prescription approach based on her experience that a certain number of strokes from a specific implement will produce the right outcome. Whilst the hairbrush appears to be the most severely painful of our implements during the course a spanking, DW has found that the more solid Spencer paddle is best for producing those long term painful reminders of a spanking. Once the more immediate stinging subsides, I then find it is replaced by a duller but continuous reminder that is there even when seated on the most apparently comfortable seating.

The delicacy with which I adopt a sitting position over the following days, particularly on a hard chair, can provide DW with a good indication of the lingering after effects. Alternatively, she also can adopt the more direct method of unexpectedly grabbing a piece of my butt, and observing my reaction. I expect that the penalty for her detection of a faked response on my part would not be worth the attempt.

Friday, April 14, 2006

Instalment (Over)Due

It seemed only just after the last of our daughters had left the house, and as I was settling down at my computer, that DW decided that an opportunity is an opportunity, and was not to be missed on any account. Her instructions were very simple and to the point - in the bedroom right now, strip down to your panties, face the corner, arms folded behind your back, get ready for what you know you deserve, and is now coming.

My anticipation over almost the last week paled into insignificance compared to what I now felt. As ever the case, and despite my best efforts, the expectation of an imminent punishment made the removal of my clothing a less than graceful undertaking - almost tripping over my jeans as I pulled them off. This was all somewhat to DW's amusement, who feigned not to understand why I should be in such an agitated state. So while I stood there in only Thursday's purple panties, with a mix of vulnerability and foreboding growing by the minute, DW made ready.

First the wooden hairbrush was transferred from its pride of place on the dresser onto the bed. In terms of the amount of sting it can inflict for the full duration of a spanking, this is a truly fearsome instrument. While I see comments in blogs and websites about how the release of endorphins, progressive deadening of the butt nerves, or whatever, can reduce the sensation of pain over the course of a spanking - absolutely none of them apply to my experience on the receiving end of this particular hairbrush. Whether it's ten, fifty, or a hundred strokes, I can attest that the last one stings just as much as the first - and although it's NOT DW's practice to tell me how many are coming, it's my job to count every single one, irrespective of the speed of their delivery, or pauses for Q&A or lecturing. It fits exactly the descriptions I've read of a hairbrush designed for spanking - solid hardwood with an absolutely flat back - and came into our possession quite by accident (or fate), but that's another story.

Meanwhile DW had place a pile of four pillows almost half way down the bed - "OK, do you know where I want you?". I turned, nodded and somewhat awkwardly, placed myself facedown with my butt raised upwards over the pillows, and grabbed a firm hold with both hands to the board at the end of the bed. Once I'd settled into position, DW placed the smooth, cool back of the hairbrush on my backside, just about where the "protection" of my panties ended - "Do you know why you are getting this?". I managed to semi-coherently explain that it was the result of my bad language in front of our girls. "Yes that's right, and maybe this will help you remember not to do it!"

For remedial spankings, DW does not even consider the luxury of warm-up strokes, and this was no exception. Alternating from one cheek to the other, DW set a steady cadence of (I estimate) about one stroke per second - fast enough to have a cumulative build-up in my pain level, but not so fast that she can't give each one her full force, and listen and watch for the right responses from me. From the combination of my flinching, involuntary exclamations and tone of my counting, DW can clearly determine which of her strokes have REALLY struck home. Probably from a combination of this particular position and DW's determination to make her point, every stroke was finding its mark - and as she progressed through thirty, to forty and then fifty, the tone of my counting had become progressively more acute, my breathing quite rapid, and the first signs of a cold sweat were emerging from my efforts to deal with the agonising build up of the stinging pain in my backside. At fifty strokes, DW paused, again placed the back of the brush gently on my backside - "Can you remember what else you are receiving this for?"

This is one of the more difficult aspects of DW's punishments. Up until now, my sole focus had been on mastering the pain being inflicted on my backside and on keeping an accurate count of the strokes but now, knowing that there was obviously more to come, I was being asked to perform some minor feat of memory. I tried to re-focus from the pain and cast around mentally and finally came up with the only thing that I could recall - that I had been too late in coming to bed earlier in the week. Now this situation can be a lose-lose from my position - to not recall may, or may not be worse than reminding DW of a yet different offence to the one she had in mind. Fortunately in this case, I picked the right one.

DW successively hitched up each side of my knickers to expose my bare butt-cheeks, expressed some limited satisfaction at the state of their colour, and set to work once again. Any illusion I had that thin nylon panties offer virtually no protection from a well-used hairbrush were dispelled by the end of the 51st stroke. There really is nothing to compare with the stinging pain of each well-aimed stroke from that hairbrush on my bare butt cheeks. As ever, DW was undeterred by my reaction to the escalated pain-level. It turned out that she had 100 strokes in mind, and inevitably, that's what I was to, and did, receive.

As I lay on the bed, breathing hard and seriously perspiring, and as I gradually relinquished my grip on the end of the bed, DW simply said, "That will do for now, we'll save the rest for later".

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Attitude and Inevitability

After I have committed an infringement, in that (majority of) occasions when a spanking cannot be administered immediately, the serving by DW of spanking 'notice' has the effect of restoring our relationship to a level of civility and stability. DW can become comfortable in the knowledge that she will exercise her agreed right to perform discipline once a suitable opportunity arises - whilst I am (somewhat less comfortably) aware that I have deserved, and will inevitably receive, a level of remedial discipline that's appropriate to my infringement.

Meanwhile, DW doesn't feel a need to maintain an angry or resentful attitude in response to my aberrant behaviour - because she knows there will be an opportunity to deal with it. Likewise, I can be certain that the level of discipline inflicted will ensure that I express genuine repentance, with the additional expectation that I'll express gratitude for receiving it. That will then be the end of the matter.

Family circumstances have meant that this particular period of notice was one of the longest that I have had to endure. Blue, yellow and purple day-of-the-week nylon panties have successively appeared from Tuesday through to Thursday, with still no clear prospect that a suitably private opportunity would be available for a spanking. Although these particular panties could be described as relatively comfortable, their silkiness and unmistakable femininity have kept me continually mindful of my status throughout the workday - and of the punishment ordeal to come.

For someone that's accustomed to wearing nothing in bed, I've found the nightly enforced wearing of panties to be a real privation - that is also an exquisite tease. With the initiation of any sexual relief being solely at DW's discretion, and with her unique ability to arouse me to the state of a raging hard-on, sometimes I am left to fall asleep with her cuddled behind me, often with her hand gently surrounding my cock in its silken prison. On other occasions, just when I have virtually given up hope of relief for the night, DW relents.

When the opportunity for my spanking ultimately did arrive, it came in instalments that made the Easter Weekend a rather painful affair.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

On Notice

After preparing for bed on Friday night, I exited the bathroom to find a pair of pastel green nylon panties sitting on my side of the bed. They were high-cut, with lace trim to the waist and legs, a gusset of white cotton and "Friday" embroidered at the front, along with a small flower. The meaning being quite clear, I resignedly slipped them on (while DW looked on knowingly) and climbed into bed with her.

The panties were not really unexpected as DW had already placed me 'on notice' for a spanking earlier in the evening - just as I had been preparing to go out for dinner with a couple of our daughters. There was no point in denying it - I had used some rather inappropriate language to one of our girls in expressing my opinion about a particular website that was giving trouble. This is clearly covered as a punishable infringement in our Disciplinary Agreement. DW had then simply followed me into the bedroom while I was putting on a jacket to go out and quietly but firmly advised "You are 'On notice' - you shouldn't be using language like that, and I and the girls shouldn't have to be hearing it".

'On Notice' is a term defined in our Disciplinary Agreement that means I am due for 'Remedial Discipline' in the form of a serious spanking. As there are other members of the family in the household, it is rarely possible that I receive such spankings immediately, so being 'On Notice' is designed to be a constant reminder that some well deserved physical discipline is inevitably on the way. Requiring that I wear panties is simply DW's method of ensuring that I am continually reminded of that fact. In my experience, my continual awareness of the silkiness and the femininity of the panties serves to moderate my temperament somewhat, and serve as a warning that any further infringements will only make the coming punishment more severe.

This relatively 'mild' form of feminisation is a private affair between DW and myself, although my choice of outerwear does need to take account of the potential for visible panty lines that might make it apparent that my underwear is designed for the female anatomy. Being placed in panties is also not something that I will simply 'get used to' to the point where it loses its salutary affect - my awareness of being in panties is almost continual throughout the day, serving as an ongoing reminder of the spanking to come, and that I need to avoid any possibility that my style of underwear becomes apparent to anyone else.

Once I am in panties it is also only at DW's initiation that we can make love. Sometimes I feel that she is teasing me rock hard and absolutely bulging but it stops at a close embrace with her cuddled tight in behind me as we go to sleep. As it was some 48 hours on Friday evening since we had made love, Friday and Saturday nights were exquisitely teasing but thankfully, Saturday morning saw some welcome respite as I was allowed to remove my panties for a some well overdue sexual relief - for both of us.

Although it had been originally planned that my disciplinary spanking session would be scheduled for Saturday night, this did not prove possible due to changes in plans by other family members. Now it is Monday and I am required to work progressively through a set of 'day-of-the-week' panties being pink for Saturday, white for Sunday and right now, red for Monday. Unfortunately, a drawer full of specifically set aside panties in our bedroom is capable maintaining a ready supply - including some that are just ridiculously frilled, tight or just plain uncomfortable, according to DW's purpose at the time.

If the intent of being 'On Notice' in this manner is to give me the incentive to submit to a scheduled discipline as soon as practicable, this is certainly achieved. I won't say that I can hardly wait to assume the position(s) of DW's choosing, but that combined feeling of real foreboding but relief at finally submitting will be more than welcome, when it arrives.